"Coming home"

Long story short, camp is over.

It ended Sunday 2/10/2013, at some point between 5pm and 7pm pacific time. It was long, and it was terrible, and it was amazing, and it was over far too soon. Camp was everything camp is in real life.. A haven, a retreat, a new world, a terrifying place full of new people, a shelter, a school, a holy place, a place to find one's self, a place to find new friends, and a place to renew and strengthen bonds with old ones. A place to try new things, and to test yourself, a place to find yourself lacking, or wanting, or failing, and a place to pick yourself up and change your attitude.

And then it's so quickly over. And you're left with a hole, where your whole world, your whole existence for a week and some change, just got summarily deleted. All that's left then are the echos of children, still ringing in the corners of your mind.

And then you return. To a loving embrace, or a friendly face, or an empty home. With or without the hand of a friend or a loved one to hold. A hug, or a kiss, or a gentle embrace, or just yourself. And you sit then, and drink in the powerful, deafening silence, as the people who filled your days, the the treasured friends, the milling anonymous crowds, the people you wanted to know better, and perhaps even a few you really didn't care for.. all are gone.

It's terrifying.

Several hours after the end of camp, my heart already bruised by having the cabin and bunk I was lying in, deleted out from under me, I sullenly return home, knowing that my Mother won't be there.

I return to a prefab prim home, full of prefab prim furniture, and so many picture frames, filled for the most part with other people's memories, and in most cases, events I didn't even witness. In the kitchen, a soulless scripted automaton gracelessly drags itself to and fro, while equally soulless prim models of babies and a kitten lay in their beds. Faint loops of sleeping sounds play in the night.

Outside, the sky is filled with particle fountains, silently raining down alpha-textured snowflakes that no one would see, if I wasn't here.

I go through the motions of rezzing out my prop luggage, and then I walk to the garage, performing the minigame ritual that purports to suggest I'm loading the washing machine. the prim washer whirrs to life, playing a looping sample of a real washing machine. I stand in the garage, rezzing my camp badges, rezzing my sash and affixing the 17 badges I'd earned, to the sash. The washer finishes, and I perform another clicking ritual to signal the system that I've "swapped loads". A looping sample of a dryer plays, and I create a pair of custom badges, one with my cabin's logo, one with the camp logo. I take up my work and return to my room.

In my room, I rez out some of the things I got at camp, watching my primcount as I do. I rez out the beautiful red ruby geode and place it atop the sculpted prim that passes for my desk. I rez out the trophy that I was given, shrinking it to a more modest size, I move it to the bookshelf. I'll need a larger bookshelf. I pull out the purple camp pillow that I purchased.. the only thing I actually did purchase while at camp, and I place it on the floor at the foot of my bed.

The silent snow continues to fall, as the prim dryer plays a sample of a buzzer sound, signaling it's completion. I wander back into the garage and perform the final 'unloading' ritual. I enter my mother's room, and summon the prim cat to follow, and I carry him into my room, where I return him to sleeping mode. I go to the bathroom, sitting in the bathub, I change my avatar's outfit to one that resembles pajamas.

Then I return back to my room. I turn on the all-important bedside lamp, place a small picture frame on my bedside table. Wordlessly, I sit my avatar on then bed, and an animation makes it appear that I'm lying down. invisible prim blankets toggle their visibilities, loosely appearing to cover me now. I select my prim kitten, and reposition him in bed alongside my avatar, just under the covers as well. I attach the prim "sleeping mask" soas to cover the eyes of my avatar that cannot be closed.

I stage a few pictures, knowing I may never crop or upload them, unsure if I'll look at them again.

Then I click the button that tells my computer to power itself down, and go to my real bed.